As quarantine continues, many Americans are turning to alcohol as a quick fix for boredom, uncertainty, and isolation. “It’s really hard to live in your body right now,” says Jenifer Talley, PhD, a psychologist at Manhattan’s Center for Optimal Living. “People are experiencing a combination of hypervigilance and being confined. For so many, it feels like the walls are closing in.” Her clients, she says, are reporting more cravings for food and alcohol — anything to jostle themselves out of whatever irritability or restlessness they may be feeling. But while drinking may seem like a quick fix for angst, for some people it can actually become a worry, especially since it can increase anxiety and depression and create problems in relationships. In this moment when so many of us are struggling to find coping mechanisms, even those who don’t consider themselves to be problem drinkers may be concerned about how much they’re relying on alcohol and may want to cut back. RELATED: 12 Questions Answered on How to Handle Anxiety in the Time of COVID-19 Occasionally, Louise has found herself consuming too much. This year, she abstained for dry January as a way to reset her brain after several weeks of indulgence. She felt great — she was training for a half marathon and dedicating her evenings to Pilates classes and writing. In February, she was back to drinking again but only on weekends. Still, she felt in control. “Then the shutdown hit in March, and I was, like, ‘COVID, hold my beer,’” she says. Structure disappeared overnight for her, as it did for everyone. Her half marathon was canceled, and the mood boost she got from social interactions vanished. Louise continued running, but as she adapted to life with her husband in quarantine, she began to drink several beers nightly as a reward for long days in endless Zoom meetings. “Drinking was just so appealing,” Louise says. “It gave me a wonderful floaty feeling and turned off that crisis response in my brain.” But within a few weeks Louise decided to dial back. Like many people who enjoy drinking, she doesn’t want to abstain completely: “I know it’s in my power to control,” she says. Methods she’s using to moderate her consumption include limiting the days on which she drinks, meditating daily, and increasing her mindfulness. RELATED: 5 Things Drinking Too Much Alcohol May Be Doing to Your Body
Commit to a dry month, or even a dry week. If you’re drinking every day, you’ve established a daily habit. “And one powerful way to break a habit is to avoid it for a period of time,” says clinical psychologist Reid Hester, PhD, the cofounder of the app CheckUp & Choices, who has helped develop guidelines for the self-help moderation group Moderation Management. If a month feels unrealistic right now, he says, start with 10 days or a week.
Limit your number of drinking days per week. Then set restrictions on the amount of alcohol you consume on the days you drink. To keep yourself accountable, write out a contract with yourself, print it out, and sign it. “If that feels silly,” Dr. Hester says, “consider that solid empirical research shows that writing out and signing an agreement significantly increases the chances of success.”
Try “urge surfing.” “When the idea of drinking pops into your head,” Dr. Talley says, “take a breath and get acquainted with it. Ask: ‘What is the urge communicating? Is it telling me that I’m bored? Lonely? Tired? What’s the information contained in the urge?’” That pause, she explains, can help you ride out the intensity of the urge, almost as if you’re surfing a wave. “Sometimes it’s uncomfortable, but with practice, you can learn that you don’t have to act on the urge right away,” she says.
Find other ways to escape your cooped-up thoughts. Talley recommends trying different ways to engage all five senses, whether that means listening to music, lighting a scented candle, or trying a new fitness app.
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Thinking About Your Future Self
Another way to cut back on drinking is to take a moment to consider your future self, Talley says. Is that future self someone who will send regrettable texts? Who will frighten her kids with erratic behavior? The idea of her future self is exactly what is keeping Lisa, 52, from stopping at the liquor store. Lisa confronts the dangers of the virus daily: She’s a healthcare aide at a suburban New York group home for the developmentally disabled in which five patients have died, and her daughter, a hospital nurse, cares for COVID-19 patients during each shift. Lisa is mostly abstinent, but once or twice a year, during stressful periods, she’s seized by the compulsion to binge drink. That’s what happened when quarantine orders went into place in mid-March. “I was ramped up with worry about my daughter and sadness over my patients,” she says. “I just didn’t want to feel all that.” One night, she drank a bottle and a half of wine and fought with her boyfriend. She felt bad the next morning but continued drinking later that day. After a painful hangover — and the shame — that followed, she hasn’t drunk since. When people do slip up, both Hester and Talley urge self-reflection and self-compassion. Today, Lisa is keeping the promise she made to herself not to drink. Instead, she writes poetry and reaches out to friends. “Everybody’s struggling right now,” she says. “I focus on the fact that I’d let a lot of people down if I drink again — especially me.” RELATED: How to Build Your Resilience During the COVID-19 Pandemic